I don’t understand why he won’t take any of this seriously but I can’t handle it anymore. I kept asking for my key back last night and he wouldn’t give it to me. Part of me is hopeful and wishes it was because he loves me. Another part of me knows it’s because he doesn’t want to lose his access to free food and keeping me to himself.
You can’t keep me to yourself if you refuse to take care of me, love me or listen to me.
I fed you almost every day for 3+ years. I didn’t eat a whole day and you didn’t notice or care. After I mentioned it crying, he said you should be able to feed yourself.
…
Even though I sacrificed my time, money and energy to cooking or going out to feed you when I should be streaming instead. You’re not giving me any choice but to become this monster who hates you.
You can’t be here if you’re going to be this worthless and useless. I used to tell you you were handsome and supported everything you tried to do. I let you live here rent free for a long ass fucking time even though you refuse to help out so I eventually had to kick you out even though I never wanted to. You can’t do this to people. I don’t even recognize myself anymore. I love you less and less every day. One day, I will stop loving you and you’re going to watch me thrive by myself or do better with someone who can give me 1 hour of help a day without making me scream my head off for 4 hours. I need someone who values me and thinks it would be fun to help me pick out outfits and make sure I stream by 7 or before midnight. I can’t do this anymore. You’d rather resent me than love me. You’d rather argue with me for 4 hours than help me for 15 minutes. I can’t live this like anymore.
This is your fault. I feel like an idiot for entertaining it but I’d been a slave to my emotions because love makes you stupid. One day you will wish you did more than make my life worse instead of better. Im sure you’re on your 5th energy drink by now or trolling the internet again like a loser instead of helping me edit photos or promoting me on Reddit like I need. I’m so glad you find doing all that is so much more of a priority than helping me or making content with me. Enjoy your loser activities.
I wanna live in Canada so bad for the universal healthcare. 🤣 Maybe I can be successful enough to buy a small cabin or property there.
Do any of you guys live somewhere awesome with universal healthcare and more?
I find you guys so fascinating. Some of you live in amazing places like Norway and Finland which I heard is fantastic. I find every person who lives in a place different from mine super interesting.
Looking for romance, romance comedy movies or series to watch. My favorite genre is Comedy and I’ve never been into romance before.
I’m not over him, but I’m over it. I want to be and do better and I guess I need some different influences. I want someone who wants to make out with me and tells me I’m pretty.
The super hot black harness and X pasties from last night’s snap show because I love denying you. 🖤 Showing you lots of skin so I can seduce you and have you all to myself. 💋 bonus nippy slip video. 😌
Chad cleaned the living room and kitchen again.
I thanked him for contributing. I apologized for raising my voice. I know I get scary sometimes. We don’t always communicate properly or treat each other with respect. It feels easier to handle. It was a lot of clothing. He put them in piles in bedroom for me to sort out. The living room looks really good. I’m gonna work out. I can breathe more easily. I shared some of my dinner with him. He said Thank you.
Today i did 2 streams! Shut them both off after 15 minutes and no tips. When I first started I usually shut down the stream within 10 minutes so I’m being generous going to 15 minutes. Posted some screen grabs so new people can know the rules and understand a little of why. I mean, if you have a brain you can understand why I started having boundaries. I don’t really need anyone publicly degrading me or wasting my time and energy. It’s like going to the strip club empty handed and expecting the dancers to be nice to you. Boy, what. 🫠 Of course, they’re gonna have an attitude while you’re trying to ask them how life is going or how much is a gol.den shower when you haven’t even thrown $20. Just shut up. 😆
My Brains also a little fried from too many people seeking free attention so thank you for your patience and understanding. Especially when I get short because I’m getting the ick from cheap people trying to pull me into a conversation while I’m naked. It just doesn’t feel good, tbh. 😅 I’m goddess but I am also human. Lol. I’m still pissed at someone named Toby who pulled 3 responses out of me pretending he was gonna tip so I know the tip before chatting is a reasonable boundary. I only have so many spoons.
And reminder for the dumbasses, I don’t have to show you anything. Don’t come into the chat room and ask why aren’t I naked already when you haven’t tipped $1 in 2 years. 🙄 I know you’re trying to pull me into doing more than I need to for free and that’s something some of you creeps do to the dumb creators.
Anyways, I’m getting stricter and focusing my time and energy on my personal angels who have taken care of me and deserve my attention. Appreciate you worshipping quietly. If you’re one of the people who enjoy mean bullying, degrading and humiliation, please just say so instead of purposely saying stuff to get me angry. I’m not into people saying certain things and once I get the ick from reading what you say, I put an ❌ next to your name cuz I don’t forget how pathetic and creepy you are.
Im willing to jump on stream again in a different outfit if we reach a summoning goal. Tributes will get rewards from Goddess. 🥰
Sincerely and with love and another post that’s way too long,
- Cindy Moon
I’ll be on at 11 pm Miami time which is about an hour from now. I enjoyed a really warm, nutritious and delicious Vietnamese meal and got a lot of stuff out of my system. Thanks for being here for me!
This is the second most toxic relationship I’ve been in. 😑
The first was a sex addictt so obviously that was WAY worse and scarier. I’m not that fearful of him “cheating” since he needs a lot to get going. Whats he going to do? Sling his soft 5 inch burrito at the girls who aren’t gonna provide dinner every night or care enough to try and get him to stop smoking, vaping and drinking 5 energy drinks a day?
I honestly think it’s just his nicotine addictionn and maybe some of the porn addictionn affecting his performance. It doesn’t matter. I’m thinking too much. I don’t care if he sleeps with other people I don’t own him and I’d rather him live his best life as long as I’m taken care of. But I’m not. And I don’t care if he wants to sling his soft cock at other girls at this point.
Obviously, I shouldn’t be in a toxic relationship at all but I’m picky with attachment issues and have read enough news to not want to date or make too many connections with people. It is what it is. I need my circle small as possible. I know less than ten people in real life and I plan on keeping it that way.
Thanks for coming to my bed talk. 🤦🏻♀️
I’ve given you more than enough of my time, love, money, opportunities, chances and energy.
If you can’t get a hard on so I can record me sucking on it for 1 minute every day then I can’t be with you. I was willing to get slammed every night live but you’re camera shy even though we are the only people in the room and we’re just canoodling.
If you’d rather be addicted to porn and lose the only person willing to take care of you then keep doing what you’ve been doing. I don’t know what you expect from me other than rage and a bratty attitude. I want and deserve princess treatment.
I’m not crazy or asking for much. It is insane for me as an online sex worker to date someone who can’t get a boner and then has the audacity to not treat me like a princess.
Don’t ever fall in love, it blows. I’d rather actively love on my online husbands for a lifetime.
I don’t need therapy, i know and understand everything going on but I’m still growing through it cuz I have feelings.
I just want 69 million dollars and my online husbands at this point. I can’t handle making any more connections rn.
I didn’t go to the market and buy us food and cook for him today. I went out to eat and treated myself to a nice meal. Then I’ll be home to stream.
I never wanted to hate on his ex but I remember him spending days texting her while the sink was full of dirty dishes, laundry hamper was full the whole Madonna Whore complex/ under appreciated girlfriend situation. I’d been crying from my life load, im still taking care of dinner, im getting crazy from the workload he won’t help me with (after I’ve paid him thousands to help me to pack for demo or handle marketing ) while I’m trying to answer 300 messages a day working 15-18 hours a day and he spent the day laughing and masturbating to nude pics of her so I don’t know what you want from me , ex girlfriend.
I don’t care what any of you say if you only had to pay $10 to see someone’s tits you’re definitely talking to her husband. 🤣
if you’re getting to see them for free, that’s even more likely. 😭💙🤣.
I’m crazy and I might never get to your message but I’m real. 😭
Yes, I could come with way less baggage but this is probably more interesting than you chatting with another onlyfans creator pretending to be a woman.
This way you know I’m real because why would anyone post any of this. 😭💙
As always, feel free to spill your tea in the DMs/expressional booth if you need. 🍵
Thanks for all the boosts. Goddess needs them and wants to hit 1 million views for the month. I’m gonna take a nap. If there’s a minimum of 50 likes on my wall posts as far as my adhd will take me I will post spicy photos as a reward. If there’s a 100 minimum likes on my wall posts I’ll masturbate live for free today. I’m raising money for refugees and Need to be big enough to make an impact. Thanks for elevating me. 😇
#cindymoon #onlyfans #actor #kindof
He told me to stop talking Schitt about him and that he’d help me with everything I’ve got going on if I stopped. I said fuckk you it’s been 3+ years, that I’m talking schitt because he hasn’t stepped up or helped me with my needs. We argued more. He screamed that I cheated on him. I screamed back at him how was I cheating if he doesnt even take me out on dates, we never established we were together and he won’t tell me I’m pretty. He’s never gotten me an anniversary gift or a Christmas gift, won’t take me on a real date while I provide him with everything he needs. Im just ???????????????????? I hate these canon events. I can’t focus.
He said I was lazy, blah blah blah and tried to shame me for masturbating when he can’t get a hard on but watches porn constantly and can only get a hard on when he sees super explicit content. Then masturbates tons when he watched hard core content. He told me to stop talking schitt before passing out on my bed.
What the fuck is actually going on
I feel so stupid.
Sometimes, I roleplay as goddess not because I have an ego because I clearly don’t, otherwise I wouldn’t be in this situationship. I roleplay goddess, king, queen, mommy or goddess cuz it lets me feel good and bigger than I really am in real life.
I’m close to my breakthrough. I don’t care anymore that he has poor people Brain. We love hate each other and I need to be surrounded by people who just love me and want me to be successful. He resents me for being able to bring in money for this job and I resent him cuz I see couples online having fun and their male partners are their biggest fans and love playing Instagram husband. These are supposed to be the sexiest years of my life.
I don’t understand why he’d rather watch me burn to the ground and become so broke and depressed I can’t help pay for his meals anymore. I know I got myself into this mess and I wish I were less human and could get in front of my emotions.
I’m gonna delete and edit photos. I have so much to do. I wish he didn’t take my laptop. I wish I could ask him for help instead of just fighting constantly to get even further. This shall pass. It has to. I want to catch up to the entrepreneurial people making 30-80k a month and I know I’ll never make A Team money if I keep this deadweight in my life. It doesn’t matter if I love him. I don’t think he really loves me. I need to make the money to make a difference in the world. I have to get out of this for more than me.
I’m fine. I just had to bitch and break the fourth wall again. Walking Gang Gang and touching grass. Watching him chase iguanas and ducks makes me feel better. Coming out of bunker more. Might watch Bad Vegan later to humble myself and remember my story is actually boring compared to what other people have gone through. Tinder swindler is even worse. I’ll make it and be free one day.
