Feeling overwhelmed? I have just the thing.
Feeling overwhelmed? I have just the thing.
2023-01-02 06:23:19 +0000 UTC View Post
sandtripper posts
There, there, I'm back, shhh shhh, it's ok If your New Year'..
There, there, I'm back, shhh shhh, it's ok If your New Year's resolution is to stress less, I've found my boobs work wonders Here's a free trial - on the house 🧡
2023-01-01 06:00:53 +0000 UTC View PostFamilies always seem so grumpy on planes - here's to introdu..
Families always seem so grumpy on planes - here's to introducing another marital issue for row 33 P.S. your kid sucks
2022-12-24 18:26:15 +0000 UTC View PostOh you don't sit at home in a small black dress? You have p..
Oh you don't sit at home in a small black dress? You have places to be? Pfft.
2022-12-22 20:50:21 +0000 UTC View PostLife hack- always lounge about in cute panties so that when ..
Life hack- always lounge about in cute panties so that when it all burns down the firefighters are tempted to save you first (A further method shown in the video & *hint, hint* it's not putting on more clothes) *Open invite to come be silly and dance around poorly with me*
2022-12-22 03:24:06 +0000 UTC View PostPanty raid - which ones are you taking?
Panty raid - which ones are you taking?
2022-12-18 04:15:26 +0000 UTC View PostThese photos/vids were a great reason to eat a whole can of ..
These photos/vids were a great reason to eat a whole can of whipped cream by myself on a Monday night ♡ tax write off?
2022-12-15 18:02:01 +0000 UTC View PostPOV you're just trying to thrive & grind when you realize yo..
POV you're just trying to thrive & grind when you realize you're late for your actual 9-5 grind
2022-12-11 21:42:29 +0000 UTC View PostWhat’s my face doing? I don’t know, I think it just needs so..
What’s my face doing? I don’t know, I think it just needs something to focus on. Shoutout to the boys who fumble with bras, front clasp ones are hard.
2022-12-11 01:09:40 +0000 UTC View PostHot tip! Get sheets that look like graph paper for more acc..
Hot tip! Get sheets that look like graph paper for more accurate measurements and better before communication! "Hey Babe, you're at (7,10) and I'm going to need you to translate that hand about 6 down and 4 left."
2022-12-09 01:41:26 +0000 UTC View PostMy ex's were right, I am a handful.
My ex's were right, I am a handful.
2022-12-08 02:28:42 +0000 UTC View PostCall me a numerator because I'm always on top?
Call me a numerator because I'm always on top?
2022-12-06 21:04:21 +0000 UTC View PostGoatish (adj): Lustful; lecherous You've heard of goat yog..
Goatish (adj): Lustful; lecherous You've heard of goat yoga, what do you think of goatish yoga?
2022-12-05 21:02:02 +0000 UTC View PostOh look at me, avoiding work and failing to convince myself ..
Oh look at me, avoiding work and failing to convince myself I shouldn't be fooling around
2022-12-05 00:06:01 +0000 UTC View PostWaking up with a cock had me thinking this was onlyFarmers -..
Waking up with a cock had me thinking this was onlyFarmers - oops
2022-12-03 17:25:04 +0000 UTC View PostYounger me wanted the cool, mysterious boy in the coffee sho..
Younger me wanted the cool, mysterious boy in the coffee shop; older me wants the side character on TV shows that wears funny shirts
2022-12-02 04:02:17 +0000 UTC View PostShould’ve Been More Specific: A Haiku They said do what I ..
Should’ve Been More Specific: A Haiku They said do what I love, but didn’t expect my Oral fixation
2022-12-01 02:18:16 +0000 UTC View PostI put on my math pants to let you know that being perpendicu..
I put on my math pants to let you know that being perpendicular to my curves is called normal because it’s very much expected of you
2022-11-30 01:30:11 +0000 UTC View PostI don’t need a devil on my shoulder, I have impulsivity
I don’t need a devil on my shoulder, I have impulsivity
2022-11-29 05:00:37 +0000 UTC View PostBe as hard as my Monday? Side note, I'm running out of loll..
Be as hard as my Monday? Side note, I'm running out of lollipops & open to suggestions
2022-11-28 20:02:15 +0000 UTC View PostI’ll get unbuttoned and you can feel the ones on your pants ..
I’ll get unbuttoned and you can feel the ones on your pants tighten on Monday 11/28! ⌚️👀 Can’t wait to be your reason to loosen (them) up 🧡 🍆💦
2022-11-28 01:30:19 +0000 UTC View PostPOV: I’m trying to be studious but then you call me over for..
POV: I’m trying to be studious but then you call me over for a little chat because we both know that test isn’t going to pass itself
2022-11-26 19:01:50 +0000 UTC View PostA homeless man in Florida told me my element was fire and th..
A homeless man in Florida told me my element was fire and thought I was undercover FBI - I think he got at least one of those right.
2022-11-25 05:16:11 +0000 UTC View PostCan’t wait to see a post on Nextdoor about the chick playing..
Can’t wait to see a post on Nextdoor about the chick playing with herself by the window 😋🥰
2022-11-19 03:44:49 +0000 UTC View PostAs a math teacher, I’ve gotta ask what your favorite angle o..
As a math teacher, I’ve gotta ask what your favorite angle of me is 🧡
2022-11-18 04:49:32 +0000 UTC View PostI was clearly going for “McDonald’s, but make it sexy”— how ..
I was clearly going for “McDonald’s, but make it sexy”— how are these Golden Arches? Unlike McDonald’s employees, I can take my top off for tips 🧡
2022-11-17 05:42:49 +0000 UTC View Post
